a good time was had by most

I learned something new this weekend! The courtroom is where you get to beat people up, if only figuratively, and get paid for it! Man, this shit rocks. I think I'm going into trial law after all. I made it to the finals in the closing argument competition this past weekend and did well but don't really care if I win or not, (which of course we don't find out for a week because it's law school and they like to stress you out) because I think I've found my calling. Litigation is where you're actually supposed to take somebody's lame ass down, joy, joy, joy and look cool and sound slick doing it. See, I'm to cute to box and get all smashed up, and I'd just bust out laughing if I tried to wrestle as soon as my opponent came out boobs swinging, so this is perfect.

Prosecution is definitely more my style, but the irony of how many times I've cussed the cops after getting yet another ticket doesn't exactly escape me. My driving record, in the words of my attorney, is 'atrocious'. I'm working on it. But hey, I won't be such a mean prosecutor; I'm full of good advice, 'cause I learned a lot about the county jails from some clients in my past couple of jobs. Apparently, don't eat the hot dogs. The bathroom isn't nearly private enough. Don't forget your lighter, either, because the bitch jailer won't bring you one when you really, really need to smoke. Also, take your own magazines because all they have in the women's jail are bad "True Detective" type stories, which on second thought can be helpful, because there is time and material to figure out how they caught your ass and how to do better next time.

My best friend and her new boyfriend came, since she needed to come see me anyway, partially to say hi and partially because she has finally realized she has shitty taste in men and really ought to listen to her friends more, so I had to check the guy out. I really, honestly do like him, but his just having a job and a willingness to eat something other than cheeseburgers puts him miles above the pack, so two thumbs up to new boy. Maybe this one will work out for her. And if he turns out to be a dick, watch out buddy! This prosecutor is coming out swinging.